My to do list:

I'm going to finish that house post when I can link to the photos (you know kind of like a real blog)that I will store on a website.I will need a little time to set it all up.I want to tie it all together with the new project and how they relate to each other.

I need to get my wife involved or else I'm going to have some impending doom.Skies have been changeable for a couple of weeks.Blue Black Blue Black and some grey .Get that song I told you about.Hey Rogue and Scoobydubious is this a good idea?Bet is is,huh?The family that blogs together..... I think she should but I'll have to suggest it and see. It is one of the two things I told you about previously.

Commend everybody for creating spaces that I love to come to and whenever I feel I can say something appropriate I guess you know I'm over my shyness stage so I will.I am learning to comment in ways that I hope cannot be misconstrued.I know the effort your putting in so I don't want you to feel unnoticed or leave you wondering wether your post or thoughts were "good".I really don't want to come across as too self-important and I hope I don't.Again balance is good here too.I'm learning alot and it is my nature to be giving if somebody can make any use out of what I have.

I find this medium lends itself to misinterpretation sometimes and for that fact I would ask for a little more slack.I will be forgiving too.True intent can't be cleared up always fast enough for example I just changed this post (it sat overnight however in full view)because I felt something wasn't coming across on a lite enough tone (tone is impossible to accurately detect and so is left up to the interpretation of the reader)and I would understand if someone took it the wrong way,especially since I think we collectively have heightened sensitivity (I know I do) levels.I type something, send it out and then I think more about it,sometimes I catch it sometimes not.I need to work on it.The comments themselves have to be deleted and redone and that's messy.I never ever in my life had a taste for teasing or berating anybody for any reason,and I won't be starting now.I do believe that everybody equally deserves respect and compassion and forgiving.In fact, I despise teasing it and have been drilling my kids about this very issue hoping they don't succumb to it.I didn't really get teased much but never the less I don't like it."If I fall behind wait for me." "I promise I'll wait for you."

I really like everybody here an awful lot and I can't explain it so I won't.I just want to say that if I feel something has "broken down" between anybody and myself it's fair to tell you I'm coming after you to see if I can repair the damage,not once, not twice but till you tell me to buzz off.I won't dog anybody though,please be honest and forthcoming and I will do the same.I won't take the chance of a misunderstanding affecting anything and this goes for all or any of you. You are all very important and I see too many good things happening that YOU all are creating to give too easily.Quitting something shakes me to my core and I won't do it lightly.

Lastly,I don't think I will be participating in any debates.I like them butI think this medium doesn't lend itself well because of the time lag thing.I'll admit to being a very competitive person but I do not want to win anything.If anybody would however like to restructure the format in a way that is more suitable to online useage I think that would be cool.I like more of a problem resolution approach myself with some good ole common ground seeking.It's only a suggetion and really we can do whatever you want or not.
It's also quite possible I would be more comfortable if we were running this country especially if MiKe would come around a little more.

Anyway there's even more to do but this enough for now.

Ohana baby!
Rob

Flashback 1972

Friday night,Seaside Ave. Stamford,Conn.
Paperboy collecting for the week for the local newspaper.Kids come to the door and then go get the money from the mother and give it to the paperpoy.
The paperboy....me.
One of the boys....nicman.


Ahead some 20 years to 1992 when I met my wife Jayne.One of her best friends....nicman.

So nicman and I knew each other personally before starting the blog and he came to it in a different manner.I asked if he would check it out and let me know what he thought about it.
I really did not ask anyone else to look at it because their opinion wouldn't have mattered to me.In fact some peoples opinions if negative would have indicated to me that I was heading in the right direction.It's a kind of backwards validation game that I like to play with.It's most fun when I actually tell them,it goes like this:
Me: "Hey what do you think of my blog."
Them: "It's stupid."
Me: "Alright,thank you,now I know I'm on the right track".

This may come as a surprise to him but I thought if nicman liked the blog then I would know it was something special.I get the feeling he thinks it's OK.I checked his link on the comment and I see he started up a blog of his own.I was a little off the ball though, because I see it was started on the 16.That's not like me at all but better late than never.I'm going to formally link to his site and at the same time start to drop some of the nonparticipating ones listed for obvious reasons.If I am mistaken please ask and I will put it back up.

At present he has two posts up and is new to blogging so I don't want to put any pressure on him but by the same token it's nice to have people come for a visit.So, to coin another religious tenent "Do unto others".

SUNDAY SERMON

I am at a slight disadvantage doing these sermons because of the fact that I no longer drink adult beverages.Today I would like to talk about that elusive "happiness" people seem to be so caught up with.This is by no means a foolproof method or guide to anyone's happiness.
These are my views although I have tried to make them inarguable and I've included some third party validation.
There are for the careful reader pieces of the puzzle already in the posts and comments published prior to this post.If you would like to pause this and go back it will come together better if not you will miss some.

There are in life obvious times of happiness with one symptom being out and out laughing.Sometimes in cases of extreme happiness one actually cries they are laughing so hard.Smiling also is another expression if happiness.
Linking moments like these together is not the way to have a happy life.
Words are limited, we use them to relate to others, feelings or ideas or facts or whatever but they fall short,they're not complete and words cannot hope to encompass every emotion we feel or adequately express them.Some people,not I,do a much better job than others at this.I know that we all know these things but it will be helpful to me to complete this excercise.
There is also another motive as you will see(gotta keep Peg interested she loves suspense)
Overall happiness derives from experiences past and present with the perception of the future thrown in just to really make things complicated.

So there's the timeline for happiness for each of us,so far I think we can agree on that.No matter how long or short the timeline is the same.I am at this point thinking seriously of deleting this post because this is hard.I could look like an idiot here(something new and different I know)But that would be a serious violation of the poemster_oath so I'll suck it up and forge on.

Let's say I am halfway through life (I am forty-seven years old born on April 2,1957(one day after April Fool's Day)) .I am in a good position to examine my own life because I am "halfway"
through.I got half-past,present,and half-future.

I won't microanalyze my past because it would be boring but to give you an overall impression of a look back.I have had half a life's worth of mixed good and bad things happen,let's say I'm just an average guy.My perception of the past is the good times were good and the bad times or hard times served to make me a complete person.I can differentiate between the two because I have experienced both.The times when I met emotional or physical or both challenges I now wear proudly as a sort of "badge".That badge allows me to walk with my head held high and deem that I am relevant in this world.I used to have a little self esteem problem when I was young.I still have it but it is not in the same direction.Imagine, me thinking I'm relevant,hmphh!I need to be more humble and I know it.I combat this by trying to be funny.

So,in the past my happiness quotion has been derived from the good and bad experiences I have had.Subconsciously,I have elevated the good and morphed the bad into good.So far so good.

The present is not hard to deal with.I stay busy and challenged physically and mentally.I am told I think way too much. I'm sure we all stand on serious common ground here.No danger in falling off this plateau,right?The kicker here seems to be in the adage (religious tenants are the best part of religion in my view)"Thou shall not want".Sounds good but that is not human nature for the most part.I see it in my kids from a very early age,they want everything they see.OK so a conscious effort is required here to hold back the reigns of wanting.This is a serious balancing act this one.Being happy with what one has and striving for better things. You-are-on-your-own.

It starts to get complicated again with the perception of the future thing.An intangible that is made up of past and present experiences squared and divided by the suppressed desires and unfulfilled dreams that we can't escape plus the helplessness we all feel that is so much a part of this life.It is further complicated by the "a priori" or given knowledge I believe we all start out with at birth.Everyone's different.(read your Kant for more info) Positive thinking only accounts for so much in this life.If we do not embrace the sadness and the bittersweet and the failures we are choosing to ignore so much of this life we are given.We cannot experience the high highs without experiencing the low lows.I sometimes prefer unrealistically of course to remain melancholy at all times in order to stay off the emotional rollercoaster we ride on.But we were born to ride so I always get back on.

Nicman posted a comment on the life of a young man named Matthew Stepanic who died recently.At thirteen years old he has fallen out of the lead position of our gaggle.Go to his site,please.I just learned of Mattie from Nicman's post and I am saddened and inspired simultaniously.He was as pure as pure can be.
His views of a happy life I hope validate what I wanted to say.
May his energy continue on in all of us.
Thank you Mattie
Thank you Nicman.

Harry Chapin's grandfather said something I think fits well with my spiel too.It's also been posted.

That concludes this too.
Have a great Sunday and life.
Rob

Poemster Q & A:

I've prepared a list of the questions that you would ask if you were asking them.No one actually asked any of these like I asked you to a while back so I'm just acting like someone asked them. Of course now they have the added benefit of being as selfserving as I want them to be.Don't blame me.

(whisper)
We caught up with Rob at his home in southern Vermont
to ask some questions about the_poemster blog he recently started as well as to get some insight as to it's success.The interview takes place on the front porch of the 1800's farmhouse.



Q:Why did you pick the name the_poemster?

A: In 1980 I bought a BMW R100S motorcycle it was the perfect bike for me,very well rounded.I could take it to the store up the road or point it at California and go.It did everything well.
Part of me however wanted to get a Harley Davidson though, and at the time they had a special model called the roadster.So this may be as close as I get to the "roadster".

Q: Thats it,huh?

A: That's it,sorry.I'll post some pics one day.I wish I still had that bike.

Q: Why did you start this blog and in the manner you did?

A: I would like to make the analogy of nonsense to cholesterol,the ratio of HDL to LDL more specifically equals total cholesterol.Good nonsense and bad nonsense equals total nonsense.
It is hard to lower the bad nonsense level so I have chosen to raise the good nonsense level to compensate.Self-preservation measure if you will.Balance,I like balance.
The manner in which I started was done so as not to wait around for anyone to notice me.Sort of wad it up and throw it on someones desktop.If I were physically there that's what I might have done.The small fish in a big pond.The poem was unobtrusive,if someone took offense I could rationalize not caring too much,it was meant to spark curiosity and if the recipient felt like responding they could.Again,only approximately 10% returned the poem.

Q: Alright so you've been noticed and things look like they are going well,now what?

A: Keep going under the same premise that I started under.I really want to be less judgemental and more understaning of others.I do want to question everything I know and everything I'm told is the truth.From religion to politics to societal matters I need a clean slate.When Jehovah's Witness shows up at my door it's partytime.Hey,it's my turf I didn't come to you.(come to think about it I haven't seen them in awhile,hmmmm I wonder why)
I never want to be rude or disrespectful but if someone insists I will accomodate them.Most of the time it comes from someone who mistakenly thinks they are superior to me in some way.Maybe it's their zipcode or title that has clouded their thinking but it's no excuse.Other times they think they can give me the same line of shit they've been giving everyone else so successfully for the past year.Whatever,most of the time it's actually fun dealing with these people,quite comical in fact.

Here, I will keep taking the first step in order to let others know they will be afforded the same treatment I like to get.How many times do you go to a get together and nobody is listening to each other?They are all vieing to speak over each other,cut each other short.Here we don't have that,it's nice.Our souls are here, they transcend our bodies,I'll hazard a guess and say it 's not just me who feels this.Our hearts are here too,hey we're the 5% (some of the ten aren't too verbal)who came in the first place.Our minds translate,organize and type and send what it's told to by the other two.(alright so I'm handicapped but I gotta lot of heart and soul to make up for it and I don't mind at all)

Look,bloggin and bloggers are funny.If it folds up tomorrow we still did something while we were here.I really wonder about the sustainability of such a thing and I will not put that kind a pressure on it.It was created in good fun and that's it, however sometimes it's not all fun so I do want to say whatever anybody that's here wants to come and talk about is fair game.If your distraught or confused or angry or having a bad or good or whatever you should feel welcome.I have broad shoulders and even though I go on and on ad infinitum, I am a real good listener and I know you all are too.Did that answer your question?

Q: zzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzz huh? wha?

A;Did that answer your question?

Q: I'll ask the questions.I'm the Q.

A:OK

Q:You have said you are learning from everyone here,what are you learning?

A: I have for a very long time not invested anytime in having friends so I haven't had any(excluding my family),you know that bothersome "call when you need something routine gets old quick."I differentiate between acquiantances and friends and like I said I did not invest the time.So I'm learning I am not a lost cause and whereas I'm not saying we're gonna be swappin spit in the shower I am investing some time now and this might also help dismantle the wall that I spent so much of my life building.My wife and especially my kids have gotten off on good start on that front.
I sense we as group have moved past the me me me phase and are into the we we we thing.It's a better place and it will be interesting to see where it goes.This is the most important but not the only thing I'm learning,some just comes in the form of validation of ideas that I have.Validation is something we all like and can be very helpful.

Q:You also said you didn't want to be political or bitchy but I think you have been both,what gives?
(to be cont)

I want to thank those who in a time of uncertainty expressed their unwavering support for my efforts.
As a precautionary measure, given the prolonged exposure to those bugs,I will be treating myself with this.I however will not take any chances and will be substituting expresso as the medium.You can't be too careful.
I will be away for the weekend and will check in from time to time.Have agreat weekend and I will be back on Monday.

poemster implosion

What can I say?I have at times a sordid sense of humor.Combine that with poor writing skills and what do you get?Right,a poemster implosion.Of what magnitude? I don't know.Might take awhile to assess the damage.
Anyway I left the posts there untouched.Seemed to freak Anna and MiKe out although I really don't think MiKe was all that freaked out.I don't buy it.He's the one who said he was going to save humanity,I just wanted to get him going in the right direction.It was un_poemster-like though,but I won't censor it for any reason.I take full responsibility for my remarks.The captain must go down with the ship.It was typed at lunchtime quickly and should have been edited to be less,uh less er maybe editted out altogether.It was convoluted thin....I was going to say convoluted thinking but it wasn't,in fact it was just convoluted.It was an attempt to analyze current vast differences in the world concerning killing and what levels are acceptable.Is it OK to kill bugs,snakes,furry creatures,people,what?It was intended to encourage dialogue on consensus building.I think the concept was alright actually but it was not put forth right.I think this isn't the right kind of site for it,after all I did say it was our site and I feel now that I let you down.I am akin to a tornado in a hurricane and it takes extra effort for me to get organized.I didn't expend much energy on this.I personally thought some of it was funny though.
The events were real however and I want you to know that the bugs did
present a "clear and gathering threat to my food supply and therefore me" and a preemptive strike was necessary.I couldn't wait to form a coalition so I went in unilaterally.
It's all stuff I'm interested in,man does not live by poems alone, you know?.Anyway,I'll monitor the traffic if I see a response that's too negative I may slip out but I'll resign publicly as poemster-in-chief.Maybe I'll include the line "you won't have the_poemster to kick around anymore" like Nixon did.If anybody feels let down it was not my intent and I apologize.
Rob

Hello,It all started on the date above with a little poem I sent to people more at less at random from the most recently pulished list:

For what it's worth
I just gave birth
To cyber graf-fi-ti

But the poemster poems
He don't write tomes
And he's on a poeming spree

Twenty seconds lent
Is time well spent
And this one is for free

the_poemster

Most people followed the link to the poeming FAQ which was more of my silliness explaining what do do if you've been "poemed".
A few people chose to send back a poem as suggested by the FAQ
and then I replied to the poem they sent.Personal service in an impersonal world.I wasn't "on the phone or away from my desk" like 90% of the planet.What this section is is the actual account of what transpired it may or may not impart the love,understanding
and friendship that has developed amongst the remaining people.Some things I am beginning to feel are better off just appreciated and not so much analyzed.Anyway it a wild dynamic that I can't explain.

the_poemster